on call centers

Contact Centers or callcenters are all the rage as of now. Companies have sprung up from nowhere (I'm waiting for someone to start a Bangladeshi or Tibetan call center here in the Philippines). Now with all this in mind. I'm a bit upset when someone tries to generalize everyone working in a "Call Center", seemingly a lot of people have this preconcieve idea that all you need to have in terms of skill in order to get hired is to be proficient in the English language, that most people who work in the industry are either highschool grads and don't require a degree to get hired. Although this is true in some cases (not to offend our neighbor upstairs hehe) not all companies are like this. I guess the major reason I am writing this, is to defend not only the industry from generalizations and preconcieve ideas but also to let people know that most of us who work in this industry are as educated and as skillful as our other counterparts in other industries. Some of the people that I work with have degrees in software engineering, programming, computer science, marketing...among others. Outsourcing, contact centers, no matter how you call it, requires skill, requires education and requires professionalism. I think I rest my case, need to go back to work.

One of my faverite plces to eat in the States is Applebees, it beats the heck out of McDonalds, especially if ur looking for a cheap place to eat. Thinking about it, I do wish they'd open up a franchise here in Manila in the future.

I owe my life to a Jew

Christmas is just around the corner. I'm quite frizzled a bit since I haven't even started my shopping yet. So much to do, so little time. I haven't even bought myself a shiny new iPod or cellphone yet! What about clothes?? I need new clothes for the holidays you know, a new shirt, pants, maybe a new pair of sneakers to keep my toes cozy warm. But of course there's that longer than the Bataan death march line to the cashier, I have to put up with that! And what is wrong with these cab drivers?? Asking for something extra in addition to what the meter charges, sheesh. So many problems, so many things that irritate me.

Christmas...it got me really thinking. Is this really all about me? Is this really all about shopping, new cellphones, iPods etc.. Like some kind of crazed maniac, everybody is going around without really even thinking why we're even celebrating. All this songs about Santa Clause, red nose raindeers...I mean, is this really what Christmas is all about?

And then I remember. I remember the reason for all of this. That thousands of years ago, a Jew was born. Yes, a Jew...born of simple parents, on a nondescript town... sent to change the world, sent to change your life and mine. Born so that you and I can have life and to have it abundantly, born so that you and I can be saved. Behind this hoopla, this foolish shopping orgy thats going on, I try to remember what this season really is all about. No, I think I'm gonna skip on that black iPod video I've been drooling to for months, no I don't care if I don't get the latest Nokia, I think I'm gonna try to save my money for the rainy days...maybe I'll buy some lechong manok and give it to that family that lives in that kariton. Better yet, I'm going to give remember with gratefulness, how my life has changed because of a Jew. I owe him that much. I owe my life to a Jew.

The Special Ops A47 Spetsnaz

This morning, the airsoft group of OSRP, me included went to Sir Tuks house in Makati to finally get our hands on our much awaited weaponry. I finally decided on getting a Spetsnaz A47, all I can say is wow, 330 FPS out of the box and was highly recommended by some of the vet airsofters. It certainly beats the crap out of the Super M and the S-System in performance although of course the M4's still get my attention in terms of their pogi points. But of course when it comes to real tine performance specially in CQB's (close quarter battles) it's the A47 who's hands down the winner. I can't believe this is actually an Ak-47 variation, although an icon, I really have not been a through and through fan of this rifle since it's been the weapon of choice for those communist/terrorist countries, like the former Soviet Union, the Taliban has also been known to use the 47. The Spetsnaz is currently used by Special Ops teams in Russia, Poland etc.

a glimpse of my station

I know, she's really pretty right? hehe, some eye candy to make work a lil bit easier and of course helps me to concentrate more on my screen hahaha.

Currently listening to...

Take a Picture by Filter. Cool song.

Updates from work

11:45 PM

Almost everyone is tuned in to online radios, listening in to the storm updates. It already started raining on my way to work, hopefully we can still go home early before the eye of the storm hits the metro. I'm currently tuned in to DZRB using RealPlayer.

Some more pics of the M4A1

Let's get it on!

The office airsoft team is about to be launched and will soon be doing combat missions by early January, as soon as the rest of the team including me completes all the gear we need. Here is a picture of my weapon of choice. M4A1 aka "Super M". Shown with some modifications, this gun definitely rocks. Unofficial name of the team: OSRP Strikers, kinda cheesy..we'll probably change it as we go along.

Whenever I get dissensitized by everything thats going on around me, bombarded by media, popculture and popular opinion. Whenever I feel I've lost my way, wilderness wanderings to places and paths I should have not taken...so far away from where I should be. I try to deeply look inside of me, I draw from deep within and take root of who I really am, holding on to my faith, holding on to what I believe...my convictions. Sometimes I do not feel as strong as I was before, and my body is aching and weary from all the battles. When my face is wet with tears and all the people I call friends have gone away and there is nobody else to listen to me. I try to listen to that still small voice inside, saying that I am not alone and that when I am weak...I can hold on to someone who's strong. Whenever my doubts and fears gets the better of me, whenever I fall down, when I don't feel loved and when loneliness sets in, grace takes hold of me and picks me so I can fight another day. Whenever I am pounded by the raging waves of the daily grind, I see the faint light of the lighthouse and I am led back to the security of the shores. There is one thing I know, that I am never alone, that I am forever held by the loving arms of grace.

Foreground (my fellow techie bud Jay with Khits and Grace. Thats me, the Chinese looking guy who's trying to look cute on camera.

Fridays and just lovin' my job

Here I am chillin at my desk, listenin to Ja Rule, my mp3 collection to keep me company, iBook by my side. I haven't finished doing the rest of my company profilling yet, well there's no hurry..its a Friday and I'm just jiviin to this weekend feel. Me, I'm just enjoying my life, my job. Man! how many people can say that? that they love their job, but its true I do. I think I have one of the bestest job in the world. I get to work with computers, software...techie stuff, I can watch YouTube whenever I want, I get calls from my clients who like what I do for them and well, I don't have to sweat it when it comes to closing a deal. Maybe it's this music, feel good, lovelife tune. A newly opened Starbucks just a few steps from my office...boy! this must be heaven. I'm surrounded by one the coolest bunch of people this side of the planet. Man, I'm blessed. Christmas is just around the corner, I think I am really going to enjoy this coming holidays, it'll be different. Company just installed a new high tech biometric scanner, hehe how cool is that! Sometimes, change can do us good, it'll open up new opportunities. Whoah! we're going home! Somethings up! see you next week.

I was listening to this song on my way to work. Beautiful, I can't stop listening to it.

Well its not far down to paradise
At least not for me
And if the wind is right you can sail away
And find tranquility
Oh, the canvas can do miracles
Just you wait and see
Baby believe me

Its not far to never-never land
No reason to pretend
And if the wind is right you can find the joy
Of innocence again
Oh, the canvas can do miracles
Just you wait and see
Baby believe me

Sailing takes me away
To where Ive always heard it could be
Just a dream and a wind to carry me
Soon I will be free

Fantasy
It gets the best of me
When Im sailing

All the world in a reverie
Every word is a symphony
Wont you believe me?

Sailing [takes me away] takes me away
To where Ive always heard it could be [where I wanna be]
Just a dream and a wind to carry me
Soon I will be free
Soon I will be free

Ahhh....

Its not far back to sanity
At least its not for me
And if he wind is right you can sail away
And find serenity
The canvas can do miracles
Just you wait and see
Baby, believe me

Sailing takes me away
To where Ive always heard it could be
Just a dream and a wind to carry me
Soon I will be free
Soon I will be free [free!]

Sailing takes me away
To where Ive always heard it could be [Ive always heard it could be]
Just a dream and a wind to carry me
Soon I will be free
Soon I will be free yeah.

Go! Go! Firefox!

Getting foxy with the Firefox 2.0! Quick! trash your old browser!

I'm a huge Firefox fan, it is the ONLY browser I use at work, its fast, simple and easy to use, plus of course it's way way better than IE in it's security features. Check out the video, created by one of it's loyal fans. I'm personally promoting Firefox, if you're still using that slow clunky old browser you're basically living in the dark ages. This is is the future of Internet browsing.

Zunemeister!

Microsofts new music player is ready to pounce upon the already crowded mp3 arena, a place wherein Apple's succesful iPod reigns supreme. Nowadays, you can see people proudly showing off their stylish white or black Videos or Nano's. Even the poser crowd is pretending to own one, with their fake shuffles and stuff. Now if you are one those people who likes to go agains the flow then the upcoming Zune will indeed be music to our ears. The question is, how finely tuned and integrated it's software will be. Let's just hope that the guy's from Seattle did their homework.

Why I like cars than girls

They're fun to be with, they're cool, they're good to look at, you look good with them, you can dress 'em up, they're not picky and they don't FREAKING CHEAT on you!!!

Currently listening to Pearl Jam's Better Man...ah, bringing back memories from the past. In the spirit of the moment, let me give you some of my favorite songs from the 90's. (not sure if all of them were from the 90's though). It was also good to be able to see the videos to this songs once again, courtesy of YouTube. In my personal opinion, the best music/songs were created during this era.

Duran Duran's Ordinary World
Tears for Fear's Break it Down Again
PM Dawn's Die Without You (a personal favorite)
Sting's Desert Rose
Seal's Kiss from A Rose

The silence envelops me as the warmth of your memories comforts me. I am lost in a world that is frozen in time. This lonelines, these lies, the pretension behind your eyes. The clock lies ticking in the background as my head turns inside upside down. Struggling to move on, grasping air with empty hands. Pretty faces pass by but all I can smell is your scent.

Training Room: Did some call sims with the new hires. Then lunch with my buddies Fredrick and Adrian at Jade Palace. This week has been enjoyable, ultra petics mode. Next week, its going to be back to the real world.

recent posting from my Friendster

Now I was supposed to write and rave about my weekends until this computer just did a Houdini trick and warped everthing to the third dimension. Now where was I? My weekends went pretty well, I finally got my copy of Fragile Things, although I haven't started reading it yet and the reason was because I wasn't so much in a reading mode. So you might ask, why not? Well, you might say I am currently not in a place that is conducive for reading. Let me paint you the picture; my new apartment isn't ready yet, I haven't moved in because the original tenants are still there, so here I am with my stuff all over my parents place, clothes...everything, no privacy whatsover, my present address is well my parents couch, get the picture do you? Now given my current schedule, how am I suppposed to start renovating and remodelling the new place? There is still so much to do and yes, I am praying that I can move in before this week is over so I can get my life back, I want to sleep in my own bed, have my own room, kitchen, wake-up and not having to worry if there are visitors around, I can walk around with shrivelled hair...you get the drift. I need my freakin privacy back. Oh well, where was I? I was supposed to be raving, first the Gaiman book, oh, I got to spend some quality time with the family Sunday, we watched "World Trade Center" at Glorietta, it was pretty good but quite melodramatic but of course what would you expect with an Oliver Stone movie?

So another work week begins, some new hires will be coming in to join the BD Dept. New faces, new people, makes things a little more interesting back at the office. But still lots of things to look forward to, there's this new airsoft team that we're planning to start, I have been checking out the new gear and boy, this is going to be one expensive hobby. You get the guns for 16K a piece, not counting the body armor gear you need. But of course this woudn't start until early next year so I still have time think whether this will be worth it or not. I am quite amused with how we guys tend to not outgrow our love for such things, little BB guns now become real ones or in my case become more powerful versions, these are motorized, capable of hundreds of rounds per minute. And then there's the cars, what used to be RC cars now become turbo chargers, engine replacement, horsepower...these are just glorified versions of the Matchbox/Tomica we use to collect and play with when we were kids. Oh well, I guess thats what makes guys more interesting, right girls? (hahaha) See you soon.

Just got a message from PowerBooks Malate this morning, my "Fragile Things" book has just arrived! (big smile)

Thank God for the weekends!

Another work day has ended, the floor is filled with smiles and laughter, who woudn't laugh or smile, the weekends have arrived and after a long week of work, its time to relax, spend time with good friends, watch a movie, finish reading that new book you just bought, waste time at a coffee shop, you get to sleep all day, watch tv all day but best of all, I get to go to church. I know, it's different. I use to spend my Sunday's at home or going to the mall, but now I've realized what I've been missing all along. It's the weekends, it's two days of bliss for people like me.

Breakfast and coffee with the BD team. Hopefully I won't get too sleepy, I need to get the most out of this Saturday (smile) See you next week people!

Just had lunch with the Bid Desk people at HotShots Emerald. Nice, big juicy hamburgers!

The reality of the industry

Several of my colleagues here at work has just passed their resignations, I guess this is the reality of the industry that I'm in. Although the industry has provided jobs for the masses, a lot of our educated workforce has been undermined, true call centers do provide high pay in comparison to the normal compensation that our daytime compatriots recieve, but to what end? Many have been given tasks similar to what answering machines do, automated, mechanical, verbatim. But again, this is the reality of what is happening to our country, we are given few opportunities to show forth what we are truly made of.

Listening to my MP3 collection, nothin much today as with the coming two weeks which is really cool. I will be going through some additional trainings for the Xsale app, so for now its maximum petics mode (haha). Tomorrow, salary day and of course the coming weekends, lots of time to relax before putting the pedal to the metal starting next month. Will be posting pictures of my workplace, station and of course me in action very soon.

I haven't gotten a lot of sleep for the past two days, I wonder if my old bud mr. insomnia, came back to give me a visit or maybe its just from all the caffeine thats been building up inside my system for the last three months, this is all your fault Starbucks!! (going back to sipping my java). I should probably try decaf from now on.

Big Boss Sean just came back from Canada, so it's back to high gear for the rest of us. VL, goody! goody! I'll be filling my vacation leave next month, hopefully it'll get approved, planning to go on a backpacking trip to...I haven't decided yet. Mindanao perhaps? I wonder how much is a plane ticket to Thailand, Phuket, gotta go there once in my lifetime. Maybe, maybe not.

Voicemail, 10 messages, most probably old customers having difficulty downloading the rebate forms or perhaps some returns again. Glad I won't have to deal with those again, which reminds me I need to change my voicemail.

Looking ahead, December is going to be one very busy month for me, lot's of work coming in even during the holidays, hopefully I won't be spending Christmas or New Year in the office, but I guess I don't mind. Back to work.

I was listening to the Edge Radio while preparing for work, heard that one of my favorite professor back at the seminary just released her new book, catchy title; "Carefrontation" by my Old Testament prof Mrs. Martha Anderson or is it Dr. Martha Anderson now. Surely miss my seminary days.

There were several questions that I asked myself, these included; "Where am I going?", Where am I headed?", What are my goals?". In asking these questions I was able to look within and assess my own life and where I was at in this present moment. It is far too easy to get lost in the fray of daily living. Goals can sometimes be lost in the momentary pursuit of the enjoyment and pleasure of daily living. The temporary can sometimes substitute for what should be the main goal. Although the sidestreets do provide a deeper perspective of the journey ahead, we must remember that they should only be one of the means and not an end to itself. Questions and silent contemplations; they provide an inner look at what we have accomplished and what we have yet to do.

Listening to ColdPlay while working.

Downtime

Torrance MIS is doing some software updates on our main application, I guess its that Bill Me Later compatibility issue with MACS (thats our main application), petics mode again. Even our next door neighbors, the credit card people have gone down for their much needed coffee/yosi break.

Current reads

A certain blog was suggested by a colleague at work. I had second thoughts about visiting it but gave it a try anyway, told myself heck, I'm bored.
I'm not really sure what the point was. I was trying to read between the lines and wondering if it was really all satire. Not going to recommend it since a lot of people might find it offensive. Although I did have a good laugh at some of the writes but overall I really don't have any respect for people who looks down on others. I find it neither amusing nor entertaining to say the least. I don't like conos, social climbers, or people pretending to be something that they're not. Period.

I am still waiting for PowerBooks to give me a call regarding my order for Fragile Things.

On the job

Contacting I.T. managers, emailing quotes for companies, more follow-up calls, eating mass quantities of sugar and msg enhanced, artificially flavored food stuff (hopefully I'll gain some superhuman abilities because of this), drinking coffee like it'll run out tomorrow, updating my blog, watching YouTube and NothingToxic, sleeping, trips to 7-11, follow-up emails, online trainings for my Cisco and Microsoft certification, speaking in alien terminology..ex. "I need a wireless router that has a built-in firewall/email protection that can connect to a cellular provider like Sprint, any suggestions guys?"; uhm..uhm..let me transfer you to our Tech Support people. (just kidding)
or I need a new powersupply for my old thingamajig so it'll be compatible with todays standard and also I need some new software to help me in my quest for world domination, oh and don't forget the updates, I might be interested in conquering the Milky Way after this", listening to my MP3 collection, more emails, Xsale, Excel, VARLeasing, CAPSITES, SRCing, MRCing, TPOPing, ALTTABBing in between (just in case the boss drops by for a visit) and of course everybody's favorite YMing and Friendster (via proxy) (shhhhh) Just another day on the job.

There is a war going on inside my mind, in my brain and in my heart. A conflict between who I have become and who I was before. It rages inside of me, a battle for my will and soul. Who's side will win is entirely up to me. For I have been given the power of choice. I have complete control over the outcome of this battle. But there is also a danger in this power that I have been given, this freedom of choice. The danger that lurks inside the dark side of me. The darkside that unleashes its wrath against the fraily of my humanity. It is my curse, it is my fate. I do the things I don't want to do and I can't seem to do the things that I ought to do. I am powerless at times against this mighty adversary, for my enemy, my foe is also within me.


In the darkness, when my eyes could only weep empty tears. In silent anguish and despair, my eyes strained to see, in desperation, I called out and reached with feeble hands to the empty space above me. Fighting off my fears and the doubts inside my mind. Unseen hands of comfort, embracing me for the man that I am. Grace flooded through my emptiness, filling me up and making me whole. In the silence of my room the battle continues to rage. But I already know the outcome of this seige. I am coming back to open arms, I am coming back to arms of grace.

Gravity

The ways of this world are grabbing a hold
Won't let me go, won't let me fly by
It takes it's toll down on my soul
‘Cause I know what I need in my life
Don't let me lose my sight of You
Don't let me lose my sight
I don't want to fall away from You
Gravity is pulling me on down
I don't want to fall away from You
Gravity is pulling me to the ground
This world keeps making me cry
But I'm going to try, going to try to fly, going to fly high
Don't want to give into the sin, want to stay in You ‘til the end
Don't want to lose my sight of You
Don't want to lose my sight
I want to fly
Into the sky
Turn my back on this old world
Leave it all behind
This place is not my home
It's got nothing for me
Only leaves me emptiness
And tears in my eyes

-Shawn McDonald

WooHoo!!

Weekends are here again! After a whole week at work, I'm now ready for some R&R (smile).

I'm glad that things are beginning to go back to normal after the typhoon. Still, the electricity at home is still yet to be restored, I know that there are still a lot of areas around the metropolis that has yet to have their power reconnected.

Among other things...

Two more days and it's the weekends again. I'm already thinking how I'm gonna spend my weekends. Have a couple'o things on my mind but let's just see (smile). Right now, typing from my company's training room along with a couple of other guys. Had to undergo "re-training" for my new job description. With it comes new application/software to learn. It's gonna be tough, but I'm good with all the coming challenges. Sometimes I do need to be stretched a bit in order for me to get outta my temporary rut. Schedule wise, it's a little bit like going back to a normal job since it's a Mon-Fri kinda of thing.

This past month has been good in many ways, I've learned that there are good people out there who are willing to listen and spend time with you, even to the point of boring them to death with the same rants over and over again. It's time for me to go back to being "normal", excuse me for that term. I know I've been quite "abnormal" for the past three months or so. It's still hard in many ways, but I'm on my way.

2:30 Work. Starting to go back to the basics. Going back to where I started. Changing, evolving, learning. Thankful, grateful for the lessons learned. Understanding that when everything comes full circle, everything boils down to one thing...purpose. Without it, life losses it's meaning, without it, life is without soul. Find your purpose, pursue it with all your might.

Displacement, giving up something in order to be able to recieve something better, much more precious. Difficult, but neccesary. Most of the time, we think what we have is the best so we cling to it like our very life depended on it. But sooner or later we realize (often the hard way) that what we're holding on to is trash in comparison to what we will be recieving, so like a kid holding on to a stupid lolli, we kick and try to tantrum our way out, but as always God, in his loving kindness and patience, who in his wisdom knows whats best, would often times have to take what we believe is best in order for us to recieve the excellent.

Foo Fighters - Best Of You
Music Video Codes By Music Video Code

Weekend review

Last Wednesday, guys night-out. Bar hopping with friends at Timog. Chilled for awhile at Starbucks, it was still too early to start the party so off we go to Quattro. Then it's Formula and Decades the rest of the night. A word of advice from the wise, never, never, ever bring a friend who's thrice more good looking than you are. Why? He gets ALL the girl's attention! Am I riiight Arvin?? (laughing)

Work update: New job description, now working with the Business Development group. Bye Macmall, hello to the challenges of corporate profilling.

A lesson learned or relearned

It's not about the destination, its about the journey. I know this is somewhat a cliche already but that is exactly what I learned from my recent trip to Galera with some friends. For some reason, it became a lesson in life rather than just a mere trip to the beach. The beach was great and all, and as to be expected I had enjoyed my time there, mostly sleeping inside our airconditioned room, eating huge amounts of horrendously priced food, babe watching, writing on my journal, eating and more eating. Thinking about it I slept a lot during my stay there, to the point that it irritated two of our friends (lol). But it really wasn't our arrival at Galera that made me excited to go on this particular trip, it was the journey, the travelling that made it more special. To go on a bus, to ride on a boat to the island. Meeting new faces, seeing different places, it was something that I really missed doing. It reminded me of a poem that started as an introduction to a book entitled "The Zahir" by Paulo Coelho. The poem was entitled "Ithaca". A reminder that in this journey called life, it's really not about thedestination, its about the journey, the in-betweens.


Ithaca
When setting out upon your way to Ithaca,
wish always that your journey be long,
full of adventure, full of lore.
Of the Laestrygones and of the Cyclopes,
of an irate Poseidon never be afraid;
such things along your way you will not find,
if lofty is your thinking, if fine sentiment
in spirit and in body touches you.
Neither Laestrygones nor Cyclopes,
nor wild Poseidon will you ever meet,
unless you bear them in your soul,
unless your soul has raised them up in front of you.

Wish always that your journey be long;
that many there be of summer morns
when with such pleasure, such great joy,
you enter ports now for the first time seen;
that you may stop at some Phoenician marts,
to purchase there the best of wares,
mother-of-pearl and coral, amber, ebony,
hedonic perfumes of all sorts--
as many such hedonic perfumes as you can;
that you may go to various Egyptian towns
to learn, and learn from those schooled there.

Your mind should ever be on Ithaca.
Your reaching there is your prime goal.
But do not rush your journey anywise.
Better that it should last for many years,
and that, now old, you moor at Ithaca at last,
a man enriched by all you gained upon the way,
and not expecting Ithaca to give you further wealth.

For Ithaca has given you the marvelous journey.
Without her you would not have set your course.
There is no more that she can give.

And if you find her poor, Ithaca will not have deceived you.
Wise as you will have become, so full of experience,
you will have understood by then what these Ithacas mean.

Konstantinos P. Kavafis

Looking forward to ordering Neil's upcoming book "Fragile Things", I will also try to order "Smokes and Murrors" on Amazon. This fast becoming an addiction (smile). I wonder if I could buy Dave McKean's artwork locally...maybe a poster or two. I can imagine it to be a little expensive.

Weekends are here again, how am I going to celebrate? I'm still not sure, hang out somewhere with friends, go home have a bit of shut eye, go to Greenbelt for coffee and more books. Nothing special really, I need to cheer up, happiness is just a state of mind James..I constantly try to remind myself. My mom use to tell me that it was raining cats and dogs when I was born...did that in fact affected my psychological makeup? (paused)

More conference meetings, this time with HP. 5:40 in the morning, a few more minutes and I'll be on my way home. On second thought, might do another hour of overtime.

11:53. Wish I didn't have to celebrate half of my birthday at the office. Sheesh. Looking forward to that Galera trip this weekend.

Quotations

Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses. You build up a whole armor, for years, so nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life... You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' or 'how very perceptive' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a body-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. Nothing should be able to do that. Especially not love. I hate love.

-The character "Rose Walker" in The Sandman #65

Mixed Metaphors Lyrics by Dave McKean

And when I fall asleep
the people in my life
fly swiftly to my side
and lean over my bed
and open up their heads
and let me look inside
and when I fall awake
I try to ask them why
but there's no-one to reply

And when I fall asleep
the objects in my house
move slowly to my side
and whisper secret names
the names they usually hide
and when I fall awake
I try to write them down
but real names are like sand
they spill out of my hands

And all the nights asleep
and all the counted sheep
and all the little deaths
and all the final breaths
the rubbish I have read
detritus in my head
and just as I am sure
I'm not dreaming after all
I stay and dream some more

Pissed off, lost my mp3 player on my way to work..GRRrr!!

Kudos to a fellow inkling

Two days ago, a certain "event" came about, it was during my two day off. A "certain" email was forwarded to several people in the office. Unfortunately, or if I may say fortunately it also reached certain people who were working at the top of the corporate ladder. A friend forwarded me a copy and if I may say, it is an excellent piece of work. I commend my friend Arvin for such an excellent literary piece. One thing pains me though, that such attempts like this would only just be as good as those minority politicians in congress, trying to convince the blind majority. A brave attempt but certainly will only fall into deaf ears. Your work is noted Arvin, fellow inkling. We may be labeled rebels or as such card carrying communist, but we join the ranks of those who in their own special way, try to change their world and go against the flow.

This is the unedited version.

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It is funny, really.

It is. It’s so funny that it breaks my ribs and causes my lungs to implode, I am reeling from an encroachment of sorts, albeit comical, it still stings. I know you’re feeling it too, this sudden urge to gag. You are probably in the same state as I am, clad in “corporate” clothes, glistening with sweat from the mad rush at the MRT.

We look nice, it is supposed to create an office environment to increase productivity and give a sense of self worth, isn’t it?

But really now, does anyone believe it? C’mon.

I understand FULLY the logic behind the move, some people slouch on the way they dress and this reflects on the company. A better dressed work force = better workers. Right? Not when these workers have been used to, and happy with, a dress code schedule that gave enough freedom to be both corporate chic and comfy. What has this move done but irritate the employees and further burden them.

Is how one looks really more important than the fervor one displays at work?

Three points on the matter, my dear, dear friends:

 We are in a TROPICAL country. We go home from 5am – 9am, with the later shifts getting more vitamin D than they require. It feels good to leave home in these attires at this hour, fresh from the shower and raring to go, but when you’re sleep deprived, exhausted and choked by clothes you were NEVER used to wearing…it’s a different story. Which leads me to my next salvo…
 A normal guy, especially a fresh graduate, has no more than 5 long-sleeved shirts. One he wore for his confirmation, two for different weddings and two new one he got for this job. Now, honestly, does anyone do his laundry weekly here?
 A simple question: WHY? Did our performance slump suddenly? Does our cotton shirts drain our ability to do well in our responsibilities. If I were to believe that we are just following the status quo in Torrance and Montreal, how I wish we had their weather, and their salary too…

I put myself in the opposite pair of shoes, and, rationalizing this dress code move (the height of this skit would be the hilarious need for all upper garments to be tucked) is possible, and thus I propose the following:

 We are becoming what Rory, in his speech when all of us came in, didn’t want us to think we are in: A call center. Yes, the big wigs that shape this nocturnal building of faux industrial chic design have decided to turn us into a call center. An answer in itself, this point doesn’t need explanation.
 Manila is under performing, and the excellent steps in Montreal are being enacted so as to provide guidance and tutelage. Oh-KAY.
 It’s all a joke and we’ll all end up just laughing about this in the near future.

Ah… how I wish we all have cars and don’t have to deal with the hustle and bustle of the daily commute. How easy it would be to be clad in long sleeves and collared shirts if we had the money to remodel the contents of our closets in a cinch and if we all lived in centrally air-conditioned hotels.

But the reality of the matter is: most of us live within our means: the only machinery that cools our midday forays with the sandman are your old, reliable industrial fans, we go to work using any of the four: a bus, a jeep, a public railway system or a ratty public AUV (Asian Utility Vehicle).

Not all of us leave in a perfect world.

*** I am sending this out to my friends within the office. I have no dream of starting anything outside a laugh out of this, and maybe some seconds of cerebral function. I hope they send it out too. I wish I could provide them with some kicks and giggles, and at the end of the week, we talk about, rant and laugh about it…but ultimately, there aint anything we can do about it, right? RIGHT? 

Two rootbeers later...

Sunday, 4:08 AM. Two cans of Mug rootbeer and a sandwhich later, I'm still hungry. Team 4 decided to order pizza (awesome!). I can't wait to sink my teeth into a nice juicy, slice of Monster pizza (definitely, heaven here on earth). I'm also craving for some Siu Mai and sharks fin soup, nothing beats Chinese food..(my Chinese sensibilities)

Work has always been laid back during weekends. So everybody tries to take advantage of it. Guitar playing in the background, working nightshift has never been as enjoyable as right now. I usually talk a lot about my job, it's really not because the company that I'm working for is perfect, actually it's far from being perfect. We do have our fair share of office politics, a**h****, terror bosses, hotties, jerks and weirdos..the usual stuff that comes with this kind of job. But you know what, I bet you that there are thousands of people out there who doesn't have a job, or even if they do, I betcha they don't get the same figures that we get. I'm practically just babbling along right now.

What else? I had a great date night during my off, special thanks to the Pimp Daddy...mt buddy Arvin was able to introduce me to some fine women (hehe) It's just nice to have dates all over again, get to know some new people. Life continues to be quite complicated, but I also have a lot to be thankful about and I guess that is whats most important. The be able to see beauty, to enjoy the simple and yes the best things in life are definitely free.

I was able to finish Gaiman's Anansi Boys, Matt, if you're reading this, get your butt off to Powerbooks and get one, that is if they still have a copy. That man is a genius, he has set a new standard for the genre, if not creating a totally new one. Go buy a book, lock your doors, turn off your phone, unplug your landlines, brew some coffee or make a nice hot mug of Swiss Miss and prepare to leave the world for awhile.

Coffee, I heard that StarBucks just released their new Black Apron Exclusive coffee, it's called Kopi Kampung, Indonesian Sulawesi. I'm not sure how the Starbucks critics are going to rate this but it might be a good idea to know what it taste like. Being a big fan of Indonesian coffee. If I could just get one of those Mazzer Mini E grinders, sheesh if not because they cost an arm and a leg.

The night my heart flew and crashed again

She was dressed impeccably, the scent of her perfume was sweet. She was wearing a smile that said; I'm yours tonight. I smiled back, trying my best not to look too amazed or awed. She gently slid her arms around mine. People laughing, music all around. The night, young and ours for the taking.

We sat down, I told her she looks ravishing, she smiled back and gave me that look that guys would die for. I was the master of the universe, the world is under my feet. The waiter was already standing, ready to take our order. The band started to play. Everything seemed perfect...

(to be continued)

Busy Busy

Emails, follow-up calls, rebates, authorization letters, faxes, orders...having a really really busy day. Still have not taken my lunch, oreos and C2 keeping me alive for now (lol) No work tomorrow! 2 days of rest..oh and a date for tomorrow! (haha) good thing it's payday. A movie and dinner sounds good to me, but not as exciting as moving in to my new apartment this coming month!

Looking through masks and mirrors by James Yee

I love writing. It is one of my passions in life. I usually need the refuge of my desk and the silence of my room to draw some kind of inspiration. But there are such moments when the god of words places his hand upon my shoulders and my hand begins to write.

Searching for an oasis in the middle of a transient desert, looking for meaning within the confines of the universe. Dreams, visions...they visit me as I sleep, leaving me empty as I wake up again. Phantom visitations from another world, keeping me safe from all that I have lost. Don't wake me up, let me lay down my head for awhile, let me wander through my slumber, taking refuge in a world that is not my own. If I ask, will you answer? If I look, will I find? Don't wake me up, I'm dreaming, don't wake me up, I'm trying to live.

Time to go home

It's 6:31 am so to speak, getting ready to go home. One more sale, this time for a Mac Pro! cool! These PC are just hot off the presses and it's still on backorder but once it ships, it'll be awesome. Now I'm ready to go home to get some shut eye.

updates from work

Unfortunatly, all happy endings come to an end. Mozilla is officially banned from work, I'm using the all lumbering, program they call explorer. Fortunately, we are still able to access Blogger. It seems this is to protect people from eating all up the precious bandwith of the company.

I was able to get the new Anansi Boys book, first edition so thats an added value. Have started reading through a few pages, seems like an excellent storyline. Gaiman seems to have such a huge interest in this God-Gods kind of thing. Can't wait to get through several chapters this weekend.

Orders for today, 2 MacBook Pros, not bad at all.

5:00 AM. I'm back at my desk from the training room. We did some conferencing with the guys from Edge Tech, updates on some new products and technology plus a new memory configurator site to assist us on thos complicated memory compatibility issues. Also some nifty SPIFF and rewards program for those who reach a specific sales percentage, cool gadgets by the way!

One thing that I'm also raving about, is that I'll be moving in to my new apartment very soon! It's pretty much smaller than the place I'm staying in right now but it's going to be my own place, no more pesky cousins around! (haha) I'll be needing a bit of time though to do some restyling and repainting. A Terra Cotta based color is really what I'm after, adding in some lighting to accentuate the colors. Hmm, I'm gonna need a lot more cash this coming month for this project to push through. Hopefully, I can move in early next month.

I was able to finish a book this week which is good since I was able to balance work, sleeping and reading...ah time, if I can just have more of it then my life will be perfect (lol). I almost forgot, it's Wednesday already! I have two days of peace and quiet, hoping to get some much needed R&R...hopefully.

Relationship wise, lots of recommendations, lots of future dates but unfortunately my schedule does not permit me to grab those "opportunities" (hehe)

Management has been a lil' bit on the strict side, hoping that I'll still be able to access Friendster via proxy. Hey IT, give us a break! Promise! we'll get you more sales!

Back to using Blogger

Well call me old school but I'm back to using Blogger. Friendster is officially banned from our office, thanks to the new guy. Anyway, there's still hope (hehe) thanks to good ol' Blogspot. So for the meantime, here is where I'm going to post my forthcoming posts and hopefully, we won't be seeing any red pop-out signs on our Mozillas.

At work...on a Sunday evenin'

It's already 6 minutes past 12, calls have been s-l-o-w, for a lot of folks working in the call center industry, this may sound like nothin short of paradise. But believe me it's boring, it really is. So while the rest of the world is still trying to enjoy the remaining hours of their weekends, watching tv or going to the movies..here we are at work on a Sunday night...checking our Friendster accounts, updating our blogs, viewing explicitly violent videos (laughing) and well waiting for calls. Ah, the joys of being an account executive.I heard some of my colleagues are planning to order pizza, sounds great to me! (smile) But well, one of the obvious advantages of working during the weekends is that there are not a lot of people on the floor, just a skeleton crew taking-in calls. So it's pretty quiet and of course work isn't that demanding as it is during weekdays. Hmm, where's the pizza guys??

New reads and etc

Currently reading "Seattle's Best Places". This is unlike any travel guide i've ever read, concise and excellently well written, it instantly transports you to the sights, smells and taste of everything that is Seattle, hmm I am actually craving Caffe Dilettante's espresso, now if they could just open up a branch here in Ortigas (in my dreams!)

Currently listening to Amy Grant's "Behind the Eyes", album was written and recorded right after her divorce. Inspiring and heart tugging, try listening to this on a rainy day. I did.

Half asleep, half awake

I rise from my bed with eyes half close, the coldness of the wind outside my window embraces me from within. Sleep came like a turtle in slow motion, I am still wishing that I woudn't feel so alone. Each day has it's moments of bliss, but there are days when you just wish time doesn't have to exist. Well, time and chance happens to us all, sometimes we rise and sometime we do fall. The rains has come, the crisp cold air of the season has dawn. May the rain wash everything anew, and the winds blow away all the hollow years. Yes indeed, these are the seasons of my life. Everything comes and goes, everthing changes like the seasons. I basked in the richness of all these experiences, I breath in everything and I delight in the richness of being alive. Yes, let the rains come and let them wash over me. As the seasons change, then so shall I.

Rants and Raves

Ranting because Brazil lost to France 1-0, Por pabor! It's gonna be an all European showdown. Hmm, I wonder if Portugal is a good bet.

Raving because of Paqiuao's win over Larios last Sunday.

After the weekends

Here I am once again in front of my PC at work. Things didn't go as I planned during the weekends. I didn't go to Bagiuo as planned, I didn't even go to the movies. Well how did I spend my weekends you ask? I stayed home, I know typical boring me. I stayed home and had my very own movie marathon right in my own room. I bought a bunch of dvd's and watched all of 'em, got myself some snacks and allowed the tube do it's work, taking me away to imaginary lands, courtesy of Hollywood of course.

Well, here is the list of the films that I watched.

1.) Black Hawk Down (so you'll know how crazy Islamic extremists can be)

2.) V for Vendetta (the line.."the people should not be afraid of their government, the
government should be afraid of their people" really gets to me)

3.) Munich (one of the best films I've seen this year. Steven Spielberg of course)

4.) Aeon Flux (Stylish, science fiction flick)

5.) Sleepless in Seattle (now I have watched this movie like a million times, but this classic
never ceases to entertain me. I love Seattle and I would really want
to visit it in the future).

Weekend Escapade plans

Weekends are here again and I'm thinking of how to spend it. First on my list.

A trip to the summer capital. Now don't laugh at me please, I have been out of the country many many times but I've never been to Baguio, that is why a day trip up the mountains might be a pretty good option. I'm planning to go there alone but several friends wanted to tag alone, well I guess thats better. It might get a bit lonely up there with all the lovebirds all over the place, the romantic scenery..well it's best to bring in some people with me.

Watch Superman at the Imax theater, now I've been to an IMax before in the States and it was really cool, but they say that the one at the Mall of Asia is one of the biggest plus I have been a huge superman fan since I was a kid, I'm very interested about the hunk that just replaced Christopher Reeves, girls are raving about him, whats new? don't know if he's as good as they say he is. Let's just see.

Go shopping and get a new haircut, hmm..I really sound like a metrosexual talking about this stuff in my blog. But well, this might also do me some good since it'll temporarily blow the lonely blues away. By the way, its salary day! Which reminds it's also time to pay the bils. Oopps more calls.

Almost time to go home...

It's 5:34, another half an hour and I'll be on my way home. It has been a good sales day once again for me. I guess, my being irritated was uncalled for. Ahh, thats just me, the ever impatient James Yee, always wanting things to be accomplished at the right time and with no delays.
All these customers throwing in all their credit card numbers and everything, it'll make you dizzy quite a bit. But well, the satisfaction of a sale being closed and the satisfaction on being able to help customers with their technical concerns is a reward in itself..the best thing is! you get paid for it. I am learning to appreciate the simple things in life all over again. To have a job, to just wake up in the evening and take a shower, put on some fresh clothes, listen to music on my way to work. I'm tired of thinking about the complexities of my life. I'm tired of thinking and wondering what could have been's and what might have been's. Ms. Morrisette was indeed correct when she told us that "life has a funny way of sneaking up to you when you think everythin's okay and everything goin' right and that life has a funny way of helping you out when you think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up in your face". This journey will get more interesting, I know it. After all I know that after everything that has happened, at the end of the day there is just one truth that I cling to, that God is still very much in control of everything and that everything will be alright. I'll be okay. I'm going to enjoy my journey, I'll breathe the air, I'll sing, I'll try to live with gusto cuz you know what, I have only one life to live and it's too short to be complicated.Ooops, its time to go home. I hear something calling me, can you hear it? It's my bed, hehe. See you soon. Let's enjoy life together shall we?

Irritated state of being (as of now)

Credit card people!!! just do what you're suppose to do! process our orders! gosh! is that too hard to ask! heck, it's YOUR job not ours! (sorry for this, just need to release some steam) believe me, words are far better than killing someone.

One terrific sales day!

Just got a sale of over $15K! After a long bidding war with Apple, after typing several quotes, numerous phone calls, sales talk, a late lunch break and overtime at work (it's already 8:55). We got the deal!!

Current Read:

The Divine Comedy by Dante Alighieri.

Currently Listening To:

Painter Song-Norah Jones

Nightingale-Norah Jones

Drops Of Jupiter-Train

Kokomo-BeachBoys

Maria Maria-Santana

Shelter From The Storm-Bob Dylan

The Horses-Rickie Lee Jones

African Samba-Santana

After The Love Has Gone-Earth Wind and Fire (The wildcard on my songlist)

Baby I Love Your Way-Big Mountain

and several other songs from the Jerri Maguire soundtrack album and Santanas' Supernatural
getting jiggy on Latin music lately...ay carumba! I guess it's the World Cup fever gettin' on to me, ViVa Brazil! Let's Go Reynaldo!!!!

A Pig Story

Have you ever tried getting a pig for a pet? Scientists say that a pig's IQ is higher than some of us think. Hmm, pigs...intelligent, gentle creatures. Let's just say we got one for a pet. We take it home, have it spayed at the vet, gave it some vitamins, fed it expensive "pig food" specially formulated to keep it healthy. We gave it a warm corner inside the house to sleep-in. We gave it a name and we decided that our pig isn't just going to be a run of the mill piggy, this pig will be special. So we bought it some clothes from the pet store, we gave it a proper name and put a tag around it's neck. We even gave it a bath...everyday. This pig, we say to ourselves will be special. And a special pig it was turning out to be, we even taught it to walk around with a leash around it's neck. Wow, our neighbors would tell us, "thats one special pig!". We spend some time just to talk to it, let it know that we cared for it, taught it a few tricks like responding to us when we call it's name. And for a long long time, our pig, our special pig did the things we wanted it to do. Our pig was indeed different, it acted more like a pet dog or a cat. It smelled nice, we brushed it's thin coat ang often called it gently by name.

One morning we woke up like the usual and started to prepare it's favorite food. We started calling it by name..."here piggy, here piggy piggy" but our pig, our special pig was nowhere to be found. We tried looking everywhere, every corner of the house. Suddenly we realize that the door was open, we went outside and to our surprise...our pig, our special, nice smelling, tag carrying healthy pig was enjoying itself, soaked in mud at the nearby mudhole, it even looked up and stared at us wondering why we even looked surprised. We slowly turned around towards the door and went inside. It was then that we realized that we were trying to transform a pig into something it was not. No matter what we do, a pig will still be a pig.

Farewell to the Yumsy

I woke up this afternoon, the buyer for the Yumsy finally came and finalize the payment. By the way, the Yumsy is the big food cart that I owned. My first attempt on being a businessman. It went well for the first couple of months, but my job in Makati during that time kept me from concentrating on the business. I had two people working for me but I also knew that I needed to manage the business fulltime for it to succeed, something that I coudn't do. Well, I'm glad to know that it is being sold to people who know what they're doing and can take care of the business. Maybe in the future, when I have enough resources, I'll get back to what I really want to do, that is to have my own business. Goodbye Yumsy, we had lot's of fun didn't we? Remember all the kolehiyalas in UST? (did I spell that right?) All the girls asking for my name and wondering if I also owned the cybercafe next door (haha). Maybe the equation Guys + business + money = girls really is right! (lol). Bye for now, gotta work.

Through the Trail of Tears

The rain has started to fall as I walk through this trail of tears. Washing away the pain of those hollowed years. The path is damp with rain, the scent of leaves damp after the rain reaches me. I am starting to walk away, slowly but surely. Trying to reach for another day. Memories flood my thoughts, of those times, of those years. Of all the promises, our joys and all the pain. It all rushes back to me like waves, rising...falling. How did it all end? Too tired to question, no longer interested to know the truth. No longer interested in playing the games that players play. No more mindgames, I'm walking on. There are questions that no longer need to be answered. I am moving on. Too tired to do this anymore. But to just go back to that moment in time, our time. To once again gaze into your eyes, the glitter of forever. I would do anything. But I know it is too late, now that everything's broken. If the walls around me could speak, they would tell you of the love I once had for you, of prayers spoken in the darkness and throughout the night. I miss the love we use to have. But now I am walking on, slowly...through this trail of tears.

At The Crossroads

Here I am again, standing at another crossroad in my life. Still hurting from all the pain. Asking the question why? Looking back at the past, trying to find the answers to all the questions. Mirrors, faces, places...crashing all around, pictures fading. Everything seems shroaded in mystery, everything is in disguise. Questions...questions but no answers. I am left under the shadow of your lies. Thinking, wondering, trying to decide, where to begin, where do I hide. Here I am again, at the crossroads...at the crossroads.

The only constant thing in this world is change

It's funny how I seem to talk about change a lot as if I was an expert on the subject. But the truth is, it is as alien to me as everybody else. The statement above is correct, the only constant thing in this world is change. Life as we know is continually flowing, constantly in flux. In the end, it is up to us if we can adjust to the movement of the tides of life. The bigger the change, the bigger the opportunities to grow, to expand. The view really is different when you're on the outside looking in. Change may seem wearisome at times especially for those of us who are looking for permanence in this ever moving world of ours. Nevertheless, we must learn to embrace it for us to survive.

Moving to a different topic. This will be a temporary home for my thoughts for awhile. I will be returning to my old home soon, but for now, this blogsite will cradle these thoughts and the forthcoming ones as well. Lets start making some new memories shall we?. New good ones.

Hollow Years

He's just the kind of man
You hear about
Who leaves his family for
An easy out
They never saw the signs
He never said a word
He couldn't take another day

Carry me to the shoreline
Bury me in the sand
Walk me across the water
And maybe you'll understand

Once the stone
You're crawling under
Is lifted off your shoulders
Once the cloud that's raining
Over your head disappears
The noise that you'll hear
Is the crashing down of hollow years

She's not the kind of girl
You hear about
She'll never want another
She'll never be without
She'll give you all the signs
She'll tell you everything
Then turn around and walk away

Carry me to the shoreline
Bury me in the sand
(Into the waves)
Walk me across the water
And maybe you'll understand

Once the stone
You're crawling under
(Once the stone)
Is lifted off your shoulders
Once the cloud that's raining
Over your head disappears
The noise that you'll hear
Is the crashing down of hollow years

Carry me to the shoreline
Bury me in the sand
(Into the waves)
Walk me across the water
And maybe you'll understand

Once the stone
You're crawling under
Is lifted off your shoulders
Once the cloud that's raining
Over your head disappears
The noise that you'll hear
Is the crashing down of hollow years

Once the stone
You're crawling under
Once the stone
You're crawling under
(The sound you'll hear,)
Once the stone
(the crashing)
You're crawling under
(down of hollow years)
Once the stone
You're crawling under
Once the stone
You're crawling under
Once the stone
You're crawling under
(The sound you'll hear, the crashing down of hollow years).

-John Petrucci