Gasping for air...

Do you ever get that feeling that you're supposed to be doing something other than what you're doing right now? I do. I've been feeling like a fish out of the water lately, out of place. I have been working in this industry for almost..4 years now. It was just a rush being able to work in an entirely new enviroment from what I'm used to, that is with church, ministry and all that stuff. I remembered going through interviews during some pretty weird hours in the morning, nothings more weirder than getting a call on your cellphone with someone telling you to come up to this floor of that building at 4:am in the morning, 4:00...wow, took a cab from my apartment to makati...it was surreal. everything looked different. I'm used to normal things you know, daylight, sunlight..you get my point. It was like going through another world were people suddenly wear jackets, people live on convenience store food, weird colored drinks.... I thought man this place is weird.! I hated all the people faking and having these weird accent, what the!? Now, several years later, I'm actually one of them. Working as a QA has a lot of perks, you're somewhat like one of the bosses, you can decide who stays, who doesn't..power and yeah, a normal mon to fri sched that doesn't change, the pay is good, better than those white collared folks who decided to work through the "normal" working hours. But now, things are different, I'm getting tired of all this, I'm tired of conversations that doesn't really make sense, where people live from one paycheck to the next, where all you talk about during your spare time is money, more money, credit cards, the latest phones, girls, partys..and yes..more partys. Tiring. I don't want to be a hypocrite, I've been there done all that. But you know what, I think I wasn't really made for this, I think there's something better out there waiting for me. I remember a lot of things you know, a lot of things that I really miss; missions, travelling, talking with real people who care about a lot of things other all the material stuff, I long for sense, for depth and yeah for something real. Maybe its time to turn the key and go back to the normal life, to what I was really created for.